Where to start with this one? It’s like opening up a massive vat of toxic, nuclear waste.
I can only speak from my experiences here. There are plenty of positive and uplifting stories of relationships out there (I think, but don’t quote me on that).
However you meet some one: pub, work, online, twitter …. It all ends up the same. Do you like them? Do they like you? Can you deal with each other’s baggage? Etc answer yes to all three and you’re on to a winner.
Unrequited love is a bugger so if they don’t like you, then rip them from your heart and never speak to them again. Believe me, you’ll thank me for this at a later date (once you’ve stopped bleeding and sobbing). If they like you but you are all ‘meh’ – end it now!!! There’s someone wonderful for them out there and giving them false hope of a relationship with you is not on *stern face*. Be gentle with them though.
The baggage issue is more complicated. When you first meet someone, you are both perfect and wonderful and amazing and don’t ever get irritated or annoyed or use the toilet …. *cough* Baggage issues are best dealt with when they ooze out slowly rather than being allowed to explode on the scene taking everyone, within a 5 mile radius ,out.
Being a single parent, I find it difficult to meet anyone let alone anyone to fall in love with and live with. Let’s just say, for arguments sake, I have met someone and let’s just say I’m feeling a bit down about it today… So, hypothetically speaking, I have met someone who has ever so slightly intoxicated me and turned me into a bundle of hormones and emotions. It’s not good although I do feel better for writing about it (hypothetically).
This imaginary person finds my children to be hard work and after a glorious few days together, has gone back to work and not been in touch since ….. Which causes me to sulk and worry and all that sort of negative stuff that doesn’t do anyone any favours whatsoever. Even my cat is pissed off with me.
Along with the dating game, comes the waiting game and the uncertainty game. My mother always says that I will know when the person is right for me because there will be no games, it will be easy. My abusive ex husband was the easier person I have dated in my life, her theory is WRONG!! Sorry mum. Saying that, if you genuinely care for someone then you are going to do your best to be with them and not muck them about…right? Right?
I’m 35, I honestly was not expecting to be still doing the dating thing at this age. I had dreams of the perfect family life, that hasn’t worked out for me and dating in general hasn’t worked out for me. Maybe I’m just one of life’s loners? The path I need to walk down only fits my shoes …. I hoped that someone might be able to carry me for a while but it looks like the life of a solitary woman has been chosen for me.
Love, tea and hugs